Dear President Trump,

One public admission does not signal that a tidal wave of same is coming, but it does open the door for more of same and thus I bet the news bit that’s got you the most tightly wound this morning is this statement from Mitch McConnell (HP article by Nick Visser):

“I was wrong,” McConnell told Fox News’ Bret Baier. “They did leave behind a plan, so I clearly made a mistake in that regard. As to whether or not the plan was followed, or who’s the critic and all the rest, I don’t have any observation about that because I don’t know enough about the details.”

Maybe Mitch’s been big on acknowledging mistakes from Day 1 and I’ve just missed all the references to his mea culpas, but I think this is new and I think it signals that he’s looking to put some light between you and him. He said he “clearly made a mistake” – on Fox News, for goodness sake! He put a veritable stake in your heart, dude!

Now, of course the latter half of the statement is total mealy-mouthed Mitch…. “….I don’t know enough about the details” my ass. If he doesn’t know about the details of the two pandemic response plans and the monstrous differences between them, then pigs really can fly to the moon. Give me a break. And still – he admitted he’d been wrong to say that Obama didn’t leave you all a plan and that is huge. (A pointed side question: What, by the way are you leaving the next administration that could remotely be categorized as constructive? Uhm. I shan’t hold my breath waiting for a response since you don’t have one.)

The other “of course” here is that we would all be fools if we thought Mitch was signaling that he’s had some sort of ‘come to Jesus, I’ve seen the errors of my ways’ revelation here and that he’s going to lead the GOP in a righteous new direction. That is total bullshit fantasy. No matter what rhetoric he and the team come up with to distance themselves from you, we have to stay clear that it’s only a political survival tactic that’s no better (and probably is worse in some ways) than the one they adopted when it became clear that you had gaslighted the minds and poisoned the hearts of their voters and they had to suck up to you if they wanted to keep their cushy jobs.

So Mitch is going to keep doing his Mitch-y shit. He’ll continue to do his level best to get as many young gun conservatives into the federal judiciary as he can, to prevent the distribution of funds and services to actual suffering people living in the US (or abroad, for that matter), to line the coffers of loyal GOP donors, and to quash voter enfranchisement. It’s not as though he made an actual apology (an admission is not the same as an apology) and it’s not as though he actually gives a rat’s ass about people dying needlessly (witness his insane support of gun rights and his insane opposition to climate change mitigation efforts), but he did back down on an Obama-attack and in this political context, that’s huge – it’s earth shaking, if not earth shattering, news.

How are you managing your blood pressure, by the way? Who’s prescribing (slipping) you what? Have they replaced all the windows and glass in picture frames in the West Wing and the WH Residence with fancy plastics that don’t shatter when TV remotes are hurled at them? You must be f*cking fit to be tied. And I’m so glad.

May we be safe from mealy-mouthed political snakes.
May we be happy when they betray the big snake but remember the little ones are still poisonous.
May we gird ourselves, gather our strengths for the tidal wave of raw sewage that’s going to spill.
May we enjoy our popcorn and Junior Mints and not get snagged by the drama.

Sincerely,
Tracy Simpson