Dear President Trump,

Laura is back on Twitter after a long break from the mayhem and earlier today she came across this gem from your guy Rudy G during his appearance on George Stephanopoulos’s ABC show This Week: “Collusion is not a crime, it was over with before the election.” Truly, no could make this shit up. We honestly didn’t think he could have said something so patently stupid so we made ourselves listen to the clip, and by golly, he really did insist that collusion isn’t a crime (good luck with that defense) and besides, it was over with before the election, as though that settles that. Do you pay him? Does he get docked a certain amount of his weekly pay for every dumb thing he says? Does he ever forfeit his entire check for total idiot remarks like today’s?

Someone on the Twitter thread floated the idea that Rudy is purposely sowing confusion. Maybe. But it sure seems like a dangerous strategy to have your personal attorney going on national TV confirming that collusion happened before the election (which is a ‘duh’ sort of thing, to be sure, but that’s the least of your problems here). I do think he’s good at tossing flash bombs of nonsense into the mix to daze and deflect, but what possible advantage could it give you, his client, to have your attorney matter-of-factly state that your campaign engaged in collusion before the election?

If it was on purpose and not just a stupid, stupid mistake, there would have to be some strategy, some way that at least he (and I suppose, you) thought that him saying this would play well with your base. But how? Is the idea that they are so in love with you that you all figured they’d chortle, slap their legs and say “Well good on him! He found a way to hose the system and beat Hillary’s ass!” Is that it? If that is it, you all must also be gambling on your base being so incensed when Congress seeks to sanction you for the collusion that Rudy has confirmed happened that they’ll literally be up in arms in your defense? Or maybe Rudy did it on purpose because he hates you – what do you think? It doesn’t seem like something a friend would say about a friend’s campaign. Just saying.

Odds are, though, that it was a phenomenally stupid mistake that will add a few more nails to the coffin of your presidency. Fingers crossed.

May we be safe from power obsessed idiots.
May we be happy when you all accidentally tell the truth.
May we hang in and stay strong through the death throes of your administration.
May we hold the line for peace.

Sincerely,
Tracy Simpson