Dear President Trump,
As promised (threatened) I’m back today with another installment on factors that aid and abet men behaving in abusive, misogynistic ways. Although it has been well described by others, no feminist rant would be complete without addressing the issue that men can typically get away with behaving badly toward women because what men do, what they produce, who they are to the world is more highly valued than what women do, what we produce, who we are to the world. So if women’s work is not valued at the same level as men’s work and you have a man mistreating a woman privately (it used to not matter whether it was private or public so maybe there’s a tiny bit of progress), even if all signs indicate the mistreatment is real, chances are people, including women, are going to try very hard to look the other way and pretend it isn’t so.
Historically, we have been so enamored of the movies, business deals, books, research or whatever that men produce or conduct that we don’t want to admit that there is an unseemly side to the great master and we don’t want to lose out on whatever he was coming up with and we don’t want whatever money or reflected glory we might be able to make off whatever the man is producing or conducting to go away. So we put up and shut up on all sides. Many, many women haven’t dared to speak out about such mistreatment by the uber-valued male perpetrator because we are sure no one will believe us, we have seen other women put through the meat grinder of public opinion when they tried to call someone out, we half believe it is our fault and half believe it isn’t that bad because we got out alive and maybe still have a job. Most aware bystanders don’t speak out because we’ve convinced ourselves it is just hearsay and we don’t know for a fact that the seventeenth woman there are whispers about that mogul mistreating really suffered anything she didn’t bring on herself, because, as noted above, we don’t want our gravy train to stop and we secretly think that preserving his greatness is more important than protecting women and preserving their dignity. All this sure helps to explain why millions of women voted for you in what has to be one of the most egregious examples of voting against one’s self-interest to date. Sigh.
May we keep us all safe.
May we value everyone’s happiness.
May we figure out how to be healthy and sane.
May we insist we all be treated like the precious works of art we are.